


FebuWhump2021 Day 23: “Don’t look”

by startrekkingaroundasgard



Series: FebuWhump2021 [23]
Category: Captain Marvel (2019), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Disfigurement, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/F, Fear of Judgement, Kissing, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Terrigenesis (Marvel), Transformation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-16 15:28:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29084658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/startrekkingaroundasgard/pseuds/startrekkingaroundasgard
Summary: After terrigenesis leaves the reader covered in scales, they fear that Carol will no longer love them.
Relationships: Carol Danvers/Reader
Series: FebuWhump2021 [23]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2156145
Kudos: 12





	FebuWhump2021 Day 23: “Don’t look”

You stared at your reflection, horrified by the monster that stared back at you. Grey, translucent scales covered every inch of your body and they itched. You wanted to claw them off but the last time you’d tried that you’d gone into shock and woken up in the infirmary.

How were you meant to have known that this would happen? The Terrigen crystals had been released into the world years ago. Surely, in all that time, if you were going to change you would have done it by now.

It was supposed to have been a joke, a laugh with the other agents to prove once and for all that you were just plain old humans. A stupid, drunken game. Sneak into storage, smash a crystal and then go find another beer when nothing happened. Only, it hadn’t gone that way.

What was meant to have been a stupid game proved to be something so much worse. No one had laughed except the universe itself as it took a gigantic shit on your head. After all, what was the point of your new power, of being able to blend into any surroundings, to camouflage yourself against any backdrop, when you would always stand out in a crowd as the freak?

Infuriated, you smashed your fist into the mirror and watched the shards fall to the ground. You turned your hand over, watched waves of black and red ripped across your scaly knuckles, a visual representation of pain you should be feeling. Only, you hadn’t really felt anything since Terrigenesis. Not the sting of a slap to the face nor the sharp cut of a blade on your wrists.

A knock on the door had you leaping against the wall, a warmth spreading through your body as your scales shifted to match the surface behind you. You held your breath, hoping that whoever was on the other side would take your silence as a very loud, “leave me the hell alone.”

Unfortunately, they did not.

“I know you’re in there.”

Carol. You closed your eyes and tried not to break down into hysterics. She had been off world for the past few months and hadn’t seen you since the transformation. You couldn’t bear for her to see you this way, for her of all people to reject you.

“I can and will blow a hole through your door if you don’t let me in.”

You chuckled despite yourself, knowing that she absolutely would. Some things never changed.

“I heard that. If you’re not wearing pants, don’t bother putting any on.”

You muttered an instruction to FRIDAY and the lock on the door clicked open. As Carol walked in, the lights dropped down to almost nothing. It was an unnecessary precaution to hide yourself as you were still firmly a part of the wall but the extra level of protection eased the weight on your chest.

However, Carol ripped away that security blanket only moments later. Her body began to glow, the swirling light of her powers illuminating your small room. The light, pure and radiant and utterly captivating, reached every corner of the space and easily cast your shadow. A smile spread across Carol’s face, brighter than the stars she travelled between. “There you are. I heard you’d got some powers of your own. You gonna stop playing hide and seek and welcome me back properly?”

“I… Please don’t look at me.”

Carol frowned. The spectacular lights that surrounded her took on a blue tinge, sad and confused. She hid those feelings well, though, smoothing out her expression with practised ease. Obeying your wish, she turned slightly, focusing instead on a picture of the pair of you from last summer, back when things had been good. “I see. Is there… If you found someone else while I was gone, that’s okay. I know I’m not around as much as you deserve.”

“It’s not that,” you promised. Your heart skipped a beat as Carol lit up once more. It would be so easy to lose yourself in her loving gaze, to pretend that nothing had changed. But the moment she laid eyes on what you’d become… Everything would change. “Terrigenesis, it changed me.”

A light smile danced across her lips. “You’re still into women, aren’t you?”

“Definitely still into women. It’s just…” You took a deep breath, steadying yourself, readying yourself for her horrified reaction. “I’m not so sure they’ll – that you’ll – still be into me.”

“Nothing will change how I feel about you.”

You closed your eyes and stepped away from the wall, scales slowly returning to their natural grey translucence. Bathed in her light, you felt even more the monster than before. Truly, how could someone so perfect ever love you?

But she didn’t pull away. She didn’t run screaming like others had, didn’t glance away or stare at you like a freak. Her expression softened, as warm and comforting as it had ever been. Carol stepped forward and cupped your cheeks, stroking your jaw with her thumb as if nothing had changed. “You’re still beautiful.”

You believed her, you truly did, but how long was it until your appearance finally turned her away? How would she react when she found scales in the shower? How long before she craved the soft touch of another instead of the roughness of your new body? For now, though, you chose to savour her while you still could. You met her lips in a gentle kiss, all the more intense for knowing that it might be your last.


End file.
